sweetone

Buffy barely made it to the toilet before her late night snack came back up. When she was finished, she wiped her mouth with a tissue just as Dawn and Willow entered the bathroom. "You okay?" Willow asked as she wet a washcloth. Buffy nodded as Dawn pulled her hair out of the way.

Willow handed her the cloth as she sat down on the edge of the tub. "This is like the fifth time you've been sick this week. Don't you think you should see a doctor?" Willow asked her with concern.

Buffy looked over at Dawn and quickly stood up. "I'm fine, it's just the flu." She assured them. She wished she could assure herself of that fact. In truth, she had been getting sick weeks before they found out. She was mortified to go to the doctor, what if he found something wrong with her, something like her mother. How could she tell Dawn that she might die again? That was not something she was prepared to do.

"I'm really fine guys, just nerves, that's all. Let's all get back to bed now." She motioned for them to leave the bathroom. Dawn hugged her tightly before heading back to her room. Willow stayed behind and waited for Buffy to get back into bed. She sat down on the bed and looked at her with concern.

"Buffy, I know I haven't been the best friend here lately, with all my problems and all, but is there something you want to talk about? Maybe possibly about a relationship with a guy we don't know about?"

Buffy sat up with a start and shook her head. "What are you asking Will? Are you suggesting I may be pregnant?" She laughed with a snort.

"No, no, no preggies. I'm positive of that. I swear to you, it's not possible. Spike isn't even human." It took her about two seconds to realize what she had just said.

Tears sprang to Buffy's eyes as she faced Willow's shocked expression. "Willow, please don't tell the others. I was using him, that's all. I needed someone and he was there for me. He seduced me somehow. I didn't even know how far I'd gotten into him until Riley showed up. He caught us in bed together and that woke me up. I've broken up with him, it's over."

Willow sat there taking in the news. "I don't blame you. We did an awful thing to you. It was only reasonable that you would turn to someone who had been through what you had." She replied as she took her hand.

Buffy frowned. "Why does everyone think what I did was okay? He says he loves me and I used him for sex. What kind of a person does that make me? You should be disgusted with me over this."

Willow gave her an understanding smile. "We all make mistakes. Friends don't turn on their friends when they make mistakes. They take them in and help them. Like you did me." She held herself up proudly. "Of course, things make more sense now. Why Spike doesn't come around anymore and why you don't go on patrol with him either. Willow paused as if unsure she should ask the next question. "Do you miss him at all?"

"I miss him all the time Will. I still want him, and he knows that. When he tells me he loves me I feel cared about, wanted in the world. He's always made me feel that way, even when Riley was still in my life. After I came back from the dead he was the only person who made me feel alive again. I don't know why really, but it was there."

"Geez Buffy, why didn't you tell me all this was going on? Maybe I could have helped. How long have you been broken up?"

"Almost three months now. I didn't tell you because I thought you would be ashamed of me. I tried to talk to you about it the night that you brought Amy back."

Buffy smiled, having finally gotten that off her chest. Now she could work on getting him out of her system with Willow's help.

Buffy lay in bed wide-awake. Talking about Spike only made her crave him. She could feel his arms pulling her close more so now. What would it take to get him out of her mind? He came to her in her dreams and she longed for it to be real. If only he were human. She turned her attention to all the bills that were due. Her money troubles were the only thing that got her to forget about him, even if for just a moment.

Her stomach growled and she groaned to herself. Now she would have to get a snack in order to get back to sleep. Kicking the covers back, she headed downstairs. It was quiet and still in the house as she made her way to the kitchen. She opened the fridge and took out a container of leftovers when her hand knocked something off the inside of the door. Reaching down to pick it up she realized it was a packet of blood. Spike started to store one there if on the occasion he was there he'd have something to eat. She had gotten so used to seeing it in there that it was not something she noticed anymore.

She moved it in between her fingers for a few seconds before turning and tossing it into the garbage. Yet another thing he left behind that she had yet to get rid of. Buffy just hadn't noticed how much of Spike was still in the house. Dawn was the only thing left that was a part of him. Dawn still spent time with him, but only at his crypt or at the bronze on occasion.

It was obvious that Dawn was attached to him and he of her. They had been together the most after Buffy died and Dawn thought of him as a member of the family, refusing to see he was a vampire. Buffy prayed Dawn would never have to see Spike in a bad light, it would be too much like when Angel turned on Buffy years earlier.

After Buffy had her snack she headed back upstairs. Being reminded of Spike would not help her to sleep now. She could sense his presence in the house. Buffy always knew when he was near. Many times since the breakup he had let himself in during the night. He would watch her sleep when she was just pretending. Every time she felt his presence and wished she could confront him. She decided it was best for both of them if she just ignored him. Now she would be awake for hours longing to hear his voice and feel his touch when he was just downstairs.

Once the house was still again, a figure moved out of the darkness to look up the stairs longingly. Spike walked over to the trash and pulled out the blood. He frowned as he realized she had discarded the last of his presence from her house. Maybe she was truly lost forever; maybe he was fooling himself to believe she would come back to him. He left her house and headed back to his crypt before the sun came up. It would be a long day for him.

Buffy decided to call in sick the next morning. She had thrown up at first light and that caused another tizzy of panic with Dawn and Willow. She promised them that if she didn't feel better in a week she would go to the doctor. An unsettling feeling crept up her spine as she realized she would have to actually go if she didn't get better. At least Willow would be out most of the morning with Tara. They were starting to do more and more together as Xander and Anya's wedding grew closer.

The doorbell ringing brought her cautiously to the door. She opened it a crack and was shocked to find Cordy standing there.

"He's with me Buffy. Gru, this is Buffy, Buffy this is Gru." Cordy looked around the house as she entered the stairwell.

Cordy was in the living room as Buffy followed Gru inside. "It's so good to see you Buffy, how've you been?" Cordy asked, trying to size up Buffy's state of mind. It didn't go unnoticed by Cordy that the slayer was not at her full strength.

"I've been better, I'm sick. The flu." Buffy looked away from Cordy hoping she too wouldn't ask if she might be pregnant.

Buffy smiled nervously at the two of them. "Never mind me now, how about you and the others? Everyone doing well?" She asked as she motioned them to sit down.

"Everyone is doing fine, including Angel. In fact, he's the reason why I stopped by here on my way home. I have some news that will come as a shock to you."

Cordy explained the details of Connors arrival as quickly as possible. She had no idea how Buffy would take hearing such a thing, but someone had to tell her.

Buffy sat still as the news sank in. Angel a father? How could it be? She just couldn't imagine it no matter how hard she tried. Her heart sank when she thought of him cuddling and cooing his baby. She wished she could see that.

"I have pictures." Cordy said pulling photos of him from her purse. "His name is Connor and he's the most beautiful baby ever."

"I'm sure he is." Buffy nodded as she took them from her. She flipped through them and smiled. He was definitely a beautiful baby; he looked a lot like his father.

"Oh he is. Connor is a miracle. He was never meant to be and yet here he is." Cordy took the pictures back from Buffy. "Darla gave her life so he could live. That was the only decent thing she ever did as a vampire." Cordy paused a moment as if reflecting on Darla and her moment of sacrifice.

Buffy rubbed her sweaty palms on her robe. "God, look at me. Here I am sitting in my robe. I must be a mess." She excused herself before heading for the stairs to get dressed. "Help yourself to anything you need while I get changed. The others will be so glad to see you when they get home." She finished as she disappeared up the stairs.

Buffy looked at herself in the bathroom mirror. "You will get through this, you will get through this." She told herself over and over again. While she was happy for Angel, she was not happy for herself. For all the times she dreamed and wished to be with Angel, and have a family, it was only cruel fate that she could never be with him ever.

Over the years she had gotten used to the idea of not being a part of his world. As time passed she began to heal more and more. Until all that was left was a dull aching of regret and love she could never have. She knew that she could never be with him even now and it was okay. She was a different person with a different life. He probably wouldn't even recognize her if he ever came back to Sunnydale. So much had changed since their last meeting after she came back from the dead.

Cordy turned when she heard Buffy's voice. "What's this?" She asked holding up the very same packet of blood Buffy had discarded that night.

Buffy rolled her eyes as she took it from her. "This? Oh, it's nothing, it's just Spike's." Buffy explained as she once again tossed it into the garbage. She groaned to herself as she realized he had witnessed her tossing it away that night. He had to of put it back in there as a way to let her know he could not fully be shut out of her life.

Buffy let out a sigh. "He drinks it when he's thirsty. Spike has been around a lot more ever since he got that chip put in his head. He took good care of Dawn when I was..well..dead. She's fond of him." Buffy looked away from Cordy in fear that she would see there was more to it than that. There was no way Buffy could explain to her about Spike.

Luckily, no other Spike references came up before Willow came home. Buffy was feeling better so a dinner had been planned for everyone, everyone except Spike. Buffy did wonder what he was doing that very moment they were gathering for a reunion dinner. It didn't seem right to leave him out, but that was the whole point of breaking up with him.

Cordy and Gru shared the story of how they met during dinner. Everyone smiled and laughed and for the first time in a long time Buffy felt jovial. It was good to have Cordy back, even if it was for one day. The next day they would be leaving and things would be back to normal again.

They all stayed up late sharing old times and love lives. Willow shot Buffy a comforting glance and Buffy felt good to have someone know what she was going through. When Riley and Sam had been there she didn't have anyone to comfort her, except for Spike. He always seemed to make her feel good, for a little while at least. It was the thought that she was using him that made her feel rotten afterwards.

When everyone was all tucked away in bed Buffy made her way upstairs. It had turned out to be a good day all in all. She learned the news of Connor and they all got caught up on things in their lives.

Willow smiled as she realized Buffy was taking the news well. "Wasn't Gru the coolest? Did you notice how quickly he and Xander bonded? Sometimes I think Xander needs to get some male friends. He's around women all the time, that can't be good."

"In total agreement." Buffy gave a thumbs up in response to Willow's little joke. Buffy held her stomach for a moment unsure if she was about to get sick again. It was tossing and turning like a washing machine in there.

"I'm fine. I think I've just been eating too much junk food lately. I'll get better when I get back to eating healthy, whenever that is. Night Will." She added as she headed to her bedroom. Willow waved a small wave as she headed to her room.

Buffy swung her legs nervously as she sat on the examination table. Why they made her put on one of those stupid paper gowns was beyond her, she just had the flu that wouldn't quit. A quick knock on the door signaled the doctor's arrival. He smiled as he looked up from the chart to shake her hand in greeting.

"Fine really, I don't know why I made this appointment. It's just this flu won't seem to let me go." She laughed nervously.

"I guess about a month or so." The doctor looked at her for a moment before sitting down. "Any chance you might be pregnant?"

"Well, sometimes miracle's happen and babies are born in the most difficult of circumstances. I'm going to give you a pregnancy test before giving you any medications. Just to be on the safe side. Okay?" He asked as he stood up. Buffy nodded wishing she could grab him by that white coat of his and make him understand that she wasn't pregnant, couldn't be pregnant.

A nurse came in and handed her a small cup. "I just need a sample of your urine. This shouldn't take more than ten or fifteen minutes. Once we know for sure, we'll go on from there."

Buffy grumbled to herself as she brought out the sample. When they saw that she wasn't pregnant they would find the real trouble and maybe then she could get on with her life.

The nurse took the sample and headed back out into the hall promising to be back soon. During the wait Buffy looked at all the posters on the wall showing the different stages of a pregnant woman. Another poster urged the need for women to watch their hearts.

As the minutes ticked on Buffy grew impatient. Why was it taking so long? And why was she worried about the test results. No way she was pregnant.

The doctor raised his hand to attempt to calm her. "These things happen all the time, women think their partner can't get them pregnant and there they are, pregnant." He paused for a moment taking in her expression.

Buffy looked at him terrified. "You could say that. Are you sure you didn't make a mistake? Can you test it again? Maybe you have me mixed up with another woman."

"We tested it twice and I can assure you there is no mistake. Buffy, there's no need to worry, women have babies all the time. I'm sure you'll do fine."

Buffy entered the kitchen and tossed her jacket onto the table. She stood there for a moment not moving, hardly breathing. Her hand went instinctively to her abdomen. A baby was inside her, growing. A baby that shouldn't exist but somehow did. Willow came into the kitchen and grabbed an apple.

Buffy shook her head as tears formed in her eyes. "I don't know. Willow, no one else can know about this. You have to keep it a secret, promise me." Buffy begged as she held her by the arms firmly.



		CHAPTER ONE Buffy barely made it to the toilet before her late night snack came back up. When she was finished, she wiped her mouth with a tissue just as Dawn and Willow entered the bathroom. "You okay?" Willow asked as she wet a washcloth. Buffy nodded as Dawn pulled her hair out of the way. Willow handed her the cloth as she sat down on the edge of the tub. "This is like the fifth time you've been sick this week. Don't you think you should see a doctor?" Willow asked her with concern. Buffy looked over at Dawn and quickly stood up. "I'm fine, it's just the flu." She assured them. She wished she could assure herself of that fact. In truth, she had been getting sick weeks before they found out. She was mortified to go to the doctor, what if he found something wrong with her, something like her mother. How could she tell Dawn that she might die again? That was not something she was prepared to do. "I'm really fine guys, just nerves, that's all. Let's all get back to bed now." She motioned for them to leave the bathroom. Dawn hugged her tightly before heading back to her room. Willow stayed behind and waited for Buffy to get back into bed. She sat down on the bed and looked at her with concern. "Buffy, I know I haven't been the best friend here lately, with all my problems and all, but is there something you want to talk about? Maybe possibly about a relationship with a guy we don't know about?" Buffy sat up with a start and shook her head. "What are you asking Will? Are you suggesting I may be pregnant?" She laughed with a snort. "Well.." "No, no, no preggies. I'm positive of that. I swear to you, it's not possible. Spike isn't even human." It took her about two seconds to realize what she had just said. Willow's mouth fell open in shock. "Spike? You slept with Spike?" She whispered. Tears sprang to Buffy's eyes as she faced Willow's shocked expression. "Willow, please don't tell the others. I was using him, that's all. I needed someone and he was there for me. He seduced me somehow. I didn't even know how far I'd gotten into him until Riley showed up. He caught us in bed together and that woke me up. I've broken up with him, it's over." Willow sat there taking in the news. "I don't blame you. We did an awful thing to you. It was only reasonable that you would turn to someone who had been through what you had." She replied as she took her hand. Buffy frowned. "Why does everyone think what I did was okay? He says he loves me and I used him for sex. What kind of a person does that make me? You should be disgusted with me over this." Willow gave her an understanding smile. "We all make mistakes. Friends don't turn on their friends when they make mistakes. They take them in and help them. Like you did me." She held herself up proudly. "Of course, things make more sense now. Why Spike doesn't come around anymore and why you don't go on patrol with him either. Willow paused as if unsure she should ask the next question. "Do you miss him at all?" "I miss him all the time Will. I still want him, and he knows that. When he tells me he loves me I feel cared about, wanted in the world. He's always made me feel that way, even when Riley was still in my life. After I came back from the dead he was the only person who made me feel alive again. I don't know why really, but it was there." "Geez Buffy, why didn't you tell me all this was going on? Maybe I could have helped. How long have you been broken up?" "Almost three months now. I didn't tell you because I thought you would be ashamed of me. I tried to talk to you about it the night that you brought Amy back." "Who else knows?" "Just Tara and Spike, that's all. You won't tell the others will you?" "I won't tell, I promise." Willow said crossing her heart with her fingers. Buffy smiled, having finally gotten that off her chest. Now she could work on getting him out of her system with Willow's help. Buffy lay in bed wide-awake. Talking about Spike only made her crave him. She could feel his arms pulling her close more so now. What would it take to get him out of her mind? He came to her in her dreams and she longed for it to be real. If only he were human. She turned her attention to all the bills that were due. Her money troubles were the only thing that got her to forget about him, even if for just a moment. Her stomach growled and she groaned to herself. Now she would have to get a snack in order to get back to sleep. Kicking the covers back, she headed downstairs. It was quiet and still in the house as she made her way to the kitchen. She opened the fridge and took out a container of leftovers when her hand knocked something off the inside of the door. Reaching down to pick it up she realized it was a packet of blood. Spike started to store one there if on the occasion he was there he'd have something to eat. She had gotten so used to seeing it in there that it was not something she noticed anymore. She moved it in between her fingers for a few seconds before turning and tossing it into the garbage. Yet another thing he left behind that she had yet to get rid of. Buffy just hadn't noticed how much of Spike was still in the house. Dawn was the only thing left that was a part of him. Dawn still spent time with him, but only at his crypt or at the bronze on occasion. It was obvious that Dawn was attached to him and he of her. They had been together the most after Buffy died and Dawn thought of him as a member of the family, refusing to see he was a vampire. Buffy prayed Dawn would never have to see Spike in a bad light, it would be too much like when Angel turned on Buffy years earlier. After Buffy had her snack she headed back upstairs. Being reminded of Spike would not help her to sleep now. She could sense his presence in the house. Buffy always knew when he was near. Many times since the breakup he had let himself in during the night. He would watch her sleep when she was just pretending. Every time she felt his presence and wished she could confront him. She decided it was best for both of them if she just ignored him. Now she would be awake for hours longing to hear his voice and feel his touch when he was just downstairs. Once the house was still again, a figure moved out of the darkness to look up the stairs longingly. Spike walked over to the trash and pulled out the blood. He frowned as he realized she had discarded the last of his presence from her house. Maybe she was truly lost forever; maybe he was fooling himself to believe she would come back to him. He left her house and headed back to his crypt before the sun came up. It would be a long day for him. Buffy decided to call in sick the next morning. She had thrown up at first light and that caused another tizzy of panic with Dawn and Willow. She promised them that if she didn't feel better in a week she would go to the doctor. An unsettling feeling crept up her spine as she realized she would have to actually go if she didn't get better. At least Willow would be out most of the morning with Tara. They were starting to do more and more together as Xander and Anya's wedding grew closer. The doorbell ringing brought her cautiously to the door. She opened it a crack and was shocked to find Cordy standing there. "Cordy! Come in!" Buffy pulled her inside and hugged her. A large handsome man came up the walk behind her and Buffy looked at him curiously. "He's with me Buffy. Gru, this is Buffy, Buffy this is Gru." Cordy looked around the house as she entered the stairwell. Buffy watched Gru as he walked past her nodding in greeting. "Nice to meet you." He replied with a smile. Buffy smiled back at him. "You too." Cordy was in the living room as Buffy followed Gru inside. "It's so good to see you Buffy, how've you been?" Cordy asked, trying to size up Buffy's state of mind. It didn't go unnoticed by Cordy that the slayer was not at her full strength. "I've been better, I'm sick. The flu." Buffy looked away from Cordy hoping she too wouldn't ask if she might be pregnant. Buffy smiled nervously at the two of them. "Never mind me now, how about you and the others? Everyone doing well?" She asked as she motioned them to sit down. "Everyone is doing fine, including Angel. In fact, he's the reason why I stopped by here on my way home. I have some news that will come as a shock to you." Buffy's heart began to race as she prepared to hear the news. Cordy explained the details of Connors arrival as quickly as possible. She had no idea how Buffy would take hearing such a thing, but someone had to tell her. Buffy sat still as the news sank in. Angel a father? How could it be? She just couldn't imagine it no matter how hard she tried. Her heart sank when she thought of him cuddling and cooing his baby. She wished she could see that. "I have pictures." Cordy said pulling photos of him from her purse. "His name is Connor and he's the most beautiful baby ever." "I'm sure he is." Buffy nodded as she took them from her. She flipped through them and smiled. He was definitely a beautiful baby; he looked a lot like his father. "He must be very proud, surprised, but proud." "Oh he is. Connor is a miracle. He was never meant to be and yet here he is." Cordy took the pictures back from Buffy. "Darla gave her life so he could live. That was the only decent thing she ever did as a vampire." Cordy paused a moment as if reflecting on Darla and her moment of sacrifice. Buffy rubbed her sweaty palms on her robe. "God, look at me. Here I am sitting in my robe. I must be a mess." She excused herself before heading for the stairs to get dressed. "Help yourself to anything you need while I get changed. The others will be so glad to see you when they get home." She finished as she disappeared up the stairs. Buffy looked at herself in the bathroom mirror. "You will get through this, you will get through this." She told herself over and over again. While she was happy for Angel, she was not happy for herself. For all the times she dreamed and wished to be with Angel, and have a family, it was only cruel fate that she could never be with him ever. Over the years she had gotten used to the idea of not being a part of his world. As time passed she began to heal more and more. Until all that was left was a dull aching of regret and love she could never have. She knew that she could never be with him even now and it was okay. She was a different person with a different life. He probably wouldn't even recognize her if he ever came back to Sunnydale. So much had changed since their last meeting after she came back from the dead. Buffy made her way into the kitchen where she heard Cordy and Gru talking softly. "Did you find what you needed?" Buffy asked as she came up behind them at the fridge. Cordy turned when she heard Buffy's voice. "What's this?" She asked holding up the very same packet of blood Buffy had discarded that night. Buffy rolled her eyes as she took it from her. "This? Oh, it's nothing, it's just Spike's." Buffy explained as she once again tossed it into the garbage. She groaned to herself as she realized he had witnessed her tossing it away that night. He had to of put it back in there as a way to let her know he could not fully be shut out of her life. "What is Spike's blood doing in your fridge?" Cordy asked, refusing to drop the subject. Buffy let out a sigh. "He drinks it when he's thirsty. Spike has been around a lot more ever since he got that chip put in his head. He took good care of Dawn when I was..well..dead. She's fond of him." Buffy looked away from Cordy in fear that she would see there was more to it than that. There was no way Buffy could explain to her about Spike. Luckily, no other Spike references came up before Willow came home. Buffy was feeling better so a dinner had been planned for everyone, everyone except Spike. Buffy did wonder what he was doing that very moment they were gathering for a reunion dinner. It didn't seem right to leave him out, but that was the whole point of breaking up with him. Cordy and Gru shared the story of how they met during dinner. Everyone smiled and laughed and for the first time in a long time Buffy felt jovial. It was good to have Cordy back, even if it was for one day. The next day they would be leaving and things would be back to normal again. They all stayed up late sharing old times and love lives. Willow shot Buffy a comforting glance and Buffy felt good to have someone know what she was going through. When Riley and Sam had been there she didn't have anyone to comfort her, except for Spike. He always seemed to make her feel good, for a little while at least. It was the thought that she was using him that made her feel rotten afterwards. When everyone was all tucked away in bed Buffy made her way upstairs. It had turned out to be a good day all in all. She learned the news of Connor and they all got caught up on things in their lives. Willow met her at the top of the stairs. "Everything peachy keen?" Buffy nodded. "Peachy and keen." Willow smiled as she realized Buffy was taking the news well. "Wasn't Gru the coolest? Did you notice how quickly he and Xander bonded? Sometimes I think Xander needs to get some male friends. He's around women all the time, that can't be good." "In total agreement." Buffy gave a thumbs up in response to Willow's little joke. Buffy held her stomach for a moment unsure if she was about to get sick again. It was tossing and turning like a washing machine in there. "You okay? Feeling sick again?" Willow asked as she noticed Buffy holding her stomach. "I'm fine. I think I've just been eating too much junk food lately. I'll get better when I get back to eating healthy, whenever that is. Night Will." She added as she headed to her bedroom. Willow waved a small wave as she headed to her room. Buffy swung her legs nervously as she sat on the examination table. Why they made her put on one of those stupid paper gowns was beyond her, she just had the flu that wouldn't quit. A quick knock on the door signaled the doctor's arrival. He smiled as he looked up from the chart to shake her hand in greeting. "Hello Buffy, how are you doing? "Fine really, I don't know why I made this appointment. It's just this flu won't seem to let me go." She laughed nervously. "How long have you had these symptoms?" "I guess about a month or so." The doctor looked at her for a moment before sitting down. "Any chance you might be pregnant?" "No way, there's no possibility to that. I haven't been with anyone that can, well, that can get me pregnant." "I see, is your partner sterile?" He asked as he jotted down a few things. "You could say that." She smiled nervously. "Well, sometimes miracle's happen and babies are born in the most difficult of circumstances. I'm going to give you a pregnancy test before giving you any medications. Just to be on the safe side. Okay?" He asked as he stood up. Buffy nodded wishing she could grab him by that white coat of his and make him understand that she wasn't pregnant, couldn't be pregnant. A nurse came in and handed her a small cup. "I just need a sample of your urine. This shouldn't take more than ten or fifteen minutes. Once we know for sure, we'll go on from there." Buffy grumbled to herself as she brought out the sample. When they saw that she wasn't pregnant they would find the real trouble and maybe then she could get on with her life. The nurse took the sample and headed back out into the hall promising to be back soon. During the wait Buffy looked at all the posters on the wall showing the different stages of a pregnant woman. Another poster urged the need for women to watch their hearts. As the minutes ticked on Buffy grew impatient. Why was it taking so long? And why was she worried about the test results. No way she was pregnant. The doctor came back in with the nurse in tow. "Just as I suspected. The results came back positive. You're pregnant." Buffy sat there speechless. "No, I told you, that's impossible." The doctor raised his hand to attempt to calm her. "These things happen all the time, women think their partner can't get them pregnant and there they are, pregnant." He paused for a moment taking in her expression. "I take it this was an unplanned pregnancy?" Buffy looked at him terrified. "You could say that. Are you sure you didn't make a mistake? Can you test it again? Maybe you have me mixed up with another woman." "We tested it twice and I can assure you there is no mistake. Buffy, there's no need to worry, women have babies all the time. I'm sure you'll do fine." Buffy entered the kitchen and tossed her jacket onto the table. She stood there for a moment not moving, hardly breathing. Her hand went instinctively to her abdomen. A baby was inside her, growing. A baby that shouldn't exist but somehow did. Willow came into the kitchen and grabbed an apple. "Hey Buffy, how'd it go?" The moment she saw her face she raced to her side. "What is it? Is something wrong?" "The doctor says I'm pregnant." Willow gave her an unbelievable look. "No way, how's that possible?" Buffy shook her head as tears formed in her eyes. "I don't know. Willow, no one else can know about this. You have to keep it a secret, promise me." Buffy begged as she held her by the arms firmly. Willow shook her head in agreement. "I promise Buffy, but sooner or later everyone is going to find out." "I know." Was all Buffy could say. Chapter Two